An Obituary

R.I.P.
Inner Critic
May 30, 1980-August 27, 2010

Dear Inner Critic-

I know we have been together for a long while now, but I've been thinking. I believe deeply in my heart that this 'relationship' we have is no longer a good fit for me anymore. You have been my companion through so many trying times, but, quite honestly, you only made things worse! Although you have been with me the majority of my life, I will no longer tolerate the awful things you say to me. I have believed those lies for far too long and I now choose to think different thoughts. I am coming to see just how beautiful, competent, and sexy (that's right, I said it!) I am. You may have helped motivate me to become, what I thought, was a better person. However, I no longer want to hide behind the veil that you have so painstakingly created for me. I no longer define myself by the thoughts you planted in my mind. I am so much more than what you have been telling me I am. Your words are poison and my antidote is to destroy any remaining memory of you. I know you will try to creep back in my life and I will have safety measures in place.

I have so much more in my life now and it's time for you to move on. For that, I bid you goodbye once and for all. I wish I could say that I am sad to see this relationship end, but I am ready to move on from your grip. You no longer have a place in my life, which is a welcome change.

I love myself more than I have ever loved you...

L

Resurrection

Holy canoli! Has it really been since January that I last blogged?! How time flies when you are making life decisions. So much has changed in that short amount of time, so I'll try to stay on track here.

First and foremost, I am now married to the man I am proud to call my husband. We have also recently invested in a new home for ourselves, so I will be busy with that project very soon. I am no longer vegan-I missed cheese and the occasional cow way too much. I have switched my MS meds and am liking this new one much better! I quit my job I was formerly at and am now an independent contractor back at my old employers location. I have my own space and it smells delightful in my office (that was an issue at the old place-don't ask).

So, this is the beginning of a new blog, a new outlook on life, a new chapter in my life journey. I have had let relationships fall to the wayside as I was weeding my way out the mud and muck, but I have vowed to make amends to this. I have also made a commitment to myself to make me #1 and start taking better care of my physical and emotional needs. It's so easy to lose sight of yourself when you are wrapped up in your own thoughts-ironic, no? It's time to start listening to that little voice inside myself that I, for so long, ignored and tried to make even smaller.

Just like the lotus that grows in some of the worst possible environments, I too shall begin to shine again and reach out for the sun. Along the way, I will remind myself that I am good and worthy of nothing but the best in life.

Love, light, and many blessings-

L

PS-I have made a blogpact with my dear friend Amy (http://seriouslyamy.blogspot.com). Check hers out as well, if you will.